This is stress relief. Let go of everything.

I don’t want a girlfriend.

I kinda just wanna have sex whenever I feel like it. That’s about it. As for my love life, it’s kinda perfect at the moment. (Nonexistent.)

Well that’s refreshing.

I’m caring about being in a relationship. Haven’t felt like that since well- a while. It’s nice great fantastic.

I’m so sexually frustrated that it’s altering my attitude. I need some BAAAAAD. I WAS ONE RING FROM MAKING A BOOTY CALL MAN. FUCK YOU MORALS.

One of my largest fears is having a close relative or friend die on me in bad terms. I mean damn. I hate to think pessimistically but I mean everyday were alive is a gift. I want to enforce how much I care about them from now on before I leave home or go anywhere. It’s not that I feel as though anything will happen to me or them but I just want to fix any problems with anyone before I leave them. I’ve just been having some really depressing dreams where people close to me die and it’s been making me want to just express more to them. It’s silly, dumb and not at all realistic but, I love them tons and I don’t ever want to end on bad terms with them. When I say a eulogy or have one spoken about me I want them to be kind, tender words and for people to remember me as a good person. One that made them smile and gave them good thoughts, good feelings and- I just want to be a good person in their eyes. That’s all.

So uh, here’s a big secret. I haven’t tried to get into a serious relationship as of late because I honestly believe that the next girlfriend I get deserves a guy with a car, a job and less weight. I already have a job, I’m getting a car tomorrow and after work I’ll be heading over to the gym with my new car. Once I feel a lot more attractive, I’ll be going on a lot more dates and making a lot more effort. I want to be perfect for miss perfect. I know it’s stupid but, I don’t want to be asking my mom/dad to take me to her house, take me to dates and all that crap. I’m a man damn it and they deserve that. So for now, single is good. Single is progress.

So, I kinda like you but at this pace we’ll go nowhere. I mean, you’re a fantastic girl but way too shy and insecure about your families opinions. Let’s admit it, we’re interested in each other but if I ask you on a date right now, you’d double think it because of family. Our awkwardness would probably be a great match too if we gave each other the shot. With my on and off caring and your timidness, this is going to be an impossible feat. A foot at a time is better than no movement at all I suppose. Bah. ;(

I like being a dickhead. Deal with it.

I’ve realized that whenever I feel like a piece of shit, I tend to treat people better. I’m a lot nicer. All this music I’m listening to is making me really contemplative. Bah.

Why don’t I get on Tumblr anymore?

because everyone I follow is getting fucked. Guess who isn’t. This guy.

Back to being a ghost!